Before I became an immigration attorney, I was an immigration client.

Well, technically, my husband was the client. 😉

I was just the stressed-out American spouse wondering if his visa would arrive before my law school classes started.

Years before I knew the legal intricacies of family-based immigration, I lived through them.

When my husband and I decided to move from Israel to the US for my law school, I had no formal training in immigration law - I was just a soon-to-be law student trying to navigate a complex system.

I filed our entire case on my own.

I researched everything I could about marriage-based immigration and even answered a government Request for Evidence (an RFE) about whether we had a U.S. domicile — something I now know as an attorney is a key requirement for sponsoring a spouse.

Looking back, I realize just how complex the process really was. And I love that now I can help my clients avoid unnecessary mistakes and delays.

I discovered we needed to start the process early - which is why we had our civil ceremony in Cyprus months before our actual wedding (that's a whole other story.)

But no amount of research prepared me for the anxiety of waiting.

We had everything riding on a timeline:

- My law school start date was fixed

- Flights were booked

- We'd given notice at our jobs

- We'd packed up our apartment

Yet everything hinged on one thing beyond our control: 

Would his immigrant visa interview happen in time? 

Would his passport with the visa be returned before our departure date?

Every day, I'd obsessively check for updates. 

I'd calculate and recalculate timelines and research what might happen if we had to change flights or if I had to go ahead without him. 

The stress was constant.

That experience - of being completely at the mercy of processing times and procedures - gave me something invaluable as an attorney: 

Empathy.

Now, when clients call asking about case status or worrying about deadlines, I don't just understand their questions intellectually - I've lived that anxiety.

When they apologize for "calling too often," I can honestly say:

"I understand completely. I've been exactly where you are."

This shared experience creates a connection that legal expertise alone never could.

Today, our bicultural family blends American and Israeli traditions. We speak Hebrew at home, keeping our children connected to their heritage. And because we grew up in different cultures, we bring unique perspectives to parenting I never could have imagined.

But I'll never forget the vulnerability of being at the mercy of processing times and administrative procedures - that memory informs every client interaction.

The technical aspects of immigration law can be learned from books and practice. But empathy? That comes from experience.

Have you ever experienced a system first as a user before becoming a professional in that field? I'd love to hear how it shaped your perspective.